Greetings to all....its been ages since I last wrote...Tomorrow will be the last day of my internship!!!!Honestly,time flies....

hmmm...How can I describe my internship experience??....

Within the first two days of the internship, few of my friends updated in their facebook that it was all great and awesome and blah2.
It irked me so much!!..because it took time for me to get used to my work and enjoy it.
The first few weeks I was dragging my feet to go to work,maybe because I got used to sleeping,eating and doing nothing during my 3 weeks holiday.
But after a while I actually started to enjoy it!!
Lets make it brief...If I was asked to list down things that I rate and grate during my internship..here would it be....

RATE

Dealing with children

Wwhen I first went there,the children were wild and uncontrollable ; the don't listen to me,some throw stuff at me if i asked them to do tasks,few imitates my action behind my back.Sometimes I really feel like crying out loud but I cant blame them,coming from violent and troubled background I tried to understand their pain and frustration.Most of them had witnessed cruel abuse by their father and some even had experienced it.

But,as time passed and I got closer to them day by day..they all started to maybe trust me...If u asked me now,I would say they all are sweet,amazing and thought full children that I got the opportunity to meet in my life.Most of them can recall vividly abuse (even of sexual nature) that happened to them and their mothers.It broke my heart,but let me tel you,these children are tiger kids.They are all bright and fast learners and I am sure they can forget all those violence and come up in their life :-)

I even got two marriage proposal. A 7 and 10 year old boys,one said to me..

MF : Can you marry me..so you no need to go away and can always be with me...
I was so touched.I don't think I can get more sweeter marriage proposal ever in my life!!

INTERNS

Another part I liked bout my internship is getting to know interns and volunteers from different part of the world.I got to know people from Germany,France,Hungary,Norway and so on.It was so great coz I found out bout cultures and life style of people from different part of the world.It quipped my interest to travel around the globe someday..(Hopefully I will)

J : You never freeze in the snow before?
Me : err...no....J : you have to do that one day.It is great experience
Me : (smiling) I will!!

EXPERIENCE

It is sometime a great experience to know people of different background from mine,but some were rather shocking to me,especially the time I saw a woman came in with a bruises and black eyes! No exaggeration here...That was the first time I saw someone who really got punched in the face!Too imagine someone one that you loved and thinks loves you too could do such horrific things to you...must be devastating.And of course those filthy rich ones who's topic of discussion were always exotic places they visited,all the latest gadget they own and I thought people like them only belong in novels and magazines.

I even got the chance to go to Syariah Court and the High Court.Quite funny actually,wearing a 'tudung' with bindhi on my forehead.

GRATE
Transportation

Since,I had to come back on my own after my work is over so public transportation was my only option.Some days it isn't so bad,sitting inside air conditioned LRT or Bus and letting your mind wander,but some other day when I was tired both emotionally and psychically all I wanted was to go back ASAP and lie down NOT spent 1 hour and half in public transportation.hmmppp

And of course KL traffic jam.I hate it so so much!At times I had to use all my willpower not to get down the bus and run screaming obscenities while puling my own hair.HONEST!!again no exaggeration here.I never experienced such mind numbing jam in good ol Ipoh.

No to mention the fact that i wasn't paid.The food prices in PJ is damn so expensive,almost enuf to gimme me a heart failure.But one of my friend from German said this :-

G : Food here are so cheap..
Me : Really?(look of surprise)
G : Yeah..yesterday I went to a Indian restaurant and ate using banana leaf and they only
charged me RM 12!!
Me : WAT..are u serious..cheap??
G : err yeah...its about 4 euros...I only spent about 20 euros for my lunch back home.

So i think that's it,to summarize my internship experience.Somehow I feel like I had matured a lot these 3 months.I realized that my perspective on marriage is totally changed.....

Give me few days to upload all those photo's okay....

Cheerz...

Bounjour...

It has been almost 5 months since my last blog..whoa..how my life has changed over this period of 5 months.

Funny to think that I will be doing my Industrial Attachment next semester.Time flies,the next thing I know,I will be graduating!!!!I got accepted into Woman's Aid Organization for my internship.Actually I am quite happy,because its something that I always wanted to do.However,I'm nervous wreck!!Hope everything goes well and maybe and just maybe I could make a difference in at least one person's life??

I started my semester differently this time.Without a person that used to be with me before.I ended it.Simply could not take it anymore.I deluded myself thinking that no matter what,LOVE has to be preserved and endured.How dumb I was.It simply isn't it if you are sad and crying most of the time,especially if your supposedly ' other half ' has a schizophrenic & split personality tendencies!!Regrets??Nope,only lessons :-) One thing sure,I am much stronger than I usedto be.

How am i now?? I am recovering slowly....for the first two weeks I did cry myself to sleep,but from that point I am only getting better each day.Life is great and I am happy!!Sure,I get lonely sometimes but I am glad to be lonely if i could get back the piece of mind that I've lost for sometime.

Moving on.....I am taking french this semester.What a big headache!!Its damn difficult,especially the pronunciation.Let me intro my self in french,

Bonjour tout.J' m appele Rubini, J' ai 22 ans.J'habite d'Ipoh.Je suis etudiantee. I am certain that if a French person listen to me speaking french,they would probably hang themselves.huhu

Randomness

In my course of life,it's very rare that i met teachers who inspire me.
However,after entering UTAR,Kampar I had came across few lecturers that inspired me alot,those whom I truly respect,people who did 'touch' my life in someways..
One of this lecturer's are Mr.Tan,who teaches me Adolescent Psychology this semester.His way of conducting a class is so unique.Yes,it can be very stressful because we all have to be on our toes racking our brain to the answers to his questions that you hardly can find in books..but somehow he challenges us to do things differently,think differently.There are also times that I do not agree with his point of view,but then there is no one definite answers to a lot of questions in this world rite.
Yesterday,I left his class in silence,pondering upon the essence of what he said in my mind over and over again for such a long time.I was thinking bout my culture and how it shaped who i am now.Sorry to say this,but I do not have much faith in the ' goodness ' of my culture that shaped me.Of course,there are some positive aspect but mostly are negative stuff that i cannot accept,the one that I rebel against.
There is a belief that culture leads to the right part at the end.Its either make you or completely breaks you.It shaped your thinking,who you want to be,who you are now.In my case,I do not think that my culture actually will ' support ' what i am doing now or even what i am going to do.
My motivation in life right now is too seek answers to many questions that plagued my own life.why people do what they do? The other day my mother said something to me that made me think of my own humanity.maybe I am my natural tendency is to be a bad human being?If so why??Honestly I don't know whether i am going to be succeed or not.I belief that i will because its something that stems from my own desire,even if i fail,I'm going to fail happily knowing that at least i tried.well.but then am i too young to say that?,maybe one day i am going to regret my actions?well..i just have to wait and see...and i have my whole lifetime for that!

Back to Blogging

im bak to blogging after quite sum time..
hope i wont stop this time..haha

Deepavali is just around the corner..
am i excited??NOP...just want to get it over with..
i wonder what is the root cause of my lack of enthusiasm

Maybe coz i lost my wallet the other day at campus ground..
haizz..wat a blow.I was darned worried coz i has two visa cards inside it with and a huge chunk of money i got for my 21st Bday..

I called Kumar to campus,cried to him..and rushed him to town to cancel my ATM cards and to do police report since i lost my IC n driving license as well.ONLY after that mu UNI people called to inform me that they found my wallet.but as expected money was all gone..

Imagine my situation,no money,ATM cards also cancelled!Argg,,thank god.Mr.K lend me money if not i really dunno how i would have survived tht day without him.Honestly,im the queen of frugality..I think hundreads time to even spent RM5,and to think that i lost so much money in a blink of an eye,is like a knife plunging through my heart..

AND of coz i would like to take the opportunity to curse the bloody ass who took my money.I wish that he would get hit by a car,failed all his exam and get his ass kicked out of UTAR.Let that idiot work in factory with a mere salary of RM500 for the rest of his life.

Hah..there u go...

holidaysss

haloo peopzz..

I'm back home after finals..

so I'm just gonna slip,watch TV n practically waste my time as much as i can!

ha ha

wish could go to Melaka with Balvin..

but what to do permission not granted...haizzzz...my fecking luck.

Currently reading Cecelia Ahern's ' A Place Called Here'..

not bad but not really captivating either...

Watched Sura that day,almost dozed off!

Vadivelu comedy was quite funny however..especially the part where he went to

watch the musical show.damn funny! and Vjay was cute too..and

Tamannah was the same overacting bore..

The Tale Of The Dead City

I am totally worn out today.
planned to go to Kampar old town to buy some stuff in Waston

and do threading coz my eyebrows are all outgrown and basically I am looking

like a damn cave woman!!

so,me and Maha went there around 3pm with the shuttle van service

only to be told that the lady who supposed to do the threading did not turn up

for work.imagine my dismay,,,and walking under the scorching hot sun for

hours and can't even find a single place to do my brows!

FUCK.FUCK.FUCK

what a waste of time.and a jungle of place,

I was bloody pissed!